Comrades, this issue that I have today has bothered my soul for centuries. That is, as Christian parents we don’t make enough efforts (if any at all) to groom our children in the ways of the Lord. I am talking about at home, through family Bible studies and prayer. This is directed mostly to Fathers, the ones that are so privileged to become heads of households. Yet most of us are definitely not concerned, and certainly unwilling to humble ourselves, hold our children’s hands, read scripture and pray with them.
I can scream about this until the Lord Comes, but it all boils down to this question: Do we care? I mean as a father/parent do you care about the spiritual wellbeing of your offsprings? Are you really concerned whether or not your own wife could be going to hell? Do you really care about what is being consumed by your kids on worldly television and the secular internet sphere? Definitely, all of us can say yes to all of these questions, however, our actions prove a certain type of hypocrisy if we are not willing to make the time to disciple those people that the Lord has entrusted under our care. Otherwise me and you might as well admit that we have failed our children in this area; we have not prioritized the very thing that is most needful to their precious souls. Sometimes some of us complain about the fact that we are not getting enough ‘platforms’ to minister in our own churches, yet there is already a large platform for Bible teaching and preaching in the comfort of our own homes, in front of our own wives and children! Most of what our kids will grow up to be will be largely because of what we taught them. Therefore, what are you teaching? Because if you don’t teach them anything, the devil will take that pleasure and teach them on your behalf. This is already happening. Here is a good quote from Dr Voddie Baucham, “If I teach my son to keep his eyes on the ball (sports), but fail to teach him to keep his eyes on Christ, I have failed as a father.”
I had been addressing a lot of us Christian parents in a general sense, however, I do not think I would do justice on this issue without turning my attention to the Gospel ministers themselves i.e. Pastors, because that is where – I believe – the real problem is. It is us, or let me say, it is you dear Shepherd who is not teaching/training your own people about the importance of family Bible and prayer because you, yourself are not doing it in your own home. Pastor Paul Washer has often spoken negatively about Sunday Schools, because according to him, these were created to replace or to excuse fathers from teaching their own children the Bible at home. After having pondered on this for long, I figured Mr. Washer has a good point. Most of us parents believe it is other people, i.e. school teachers who are responsible for teaching our children the values of the Christian faith. How wrong! There is a verse in Scripture, that sometimes I wish wasn’t there because of the way it rebukes me. It says, “For if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God's church? (1 Tim 3:5)”
I want to do this for my family, how do I start?
This is for those who are willing and wishing to be those kind of fathers/parents who disciple all those under their roof but with no knowledge of how to do it. I have made time to help each other in this through the steps below. After all, there is always a first time for everything, is it not?
Pray
The first step for doing anything in this spiritual journey is to acknowledge that you are insufficient in yourself. None of us have enough strength or knowledge to accomplish such great tasks. Off to our prayer closets, we go. Pray that you will be empowered, and motivated by the Good Spirit to do this. Pray for Biblical insight and above all, don’t forget to pray for those young souls that will listen to you as you explain the Christian truth to them.
Prepare
To prepare for something ahead of time always means this: you care. Therefore, as much as we prepare for our holidays, meals and groceries, and even sermons, we must also plan ahead of time about our family worship. That may include allocating the time you will do this, studying your Bible, selecting the verse, and even writing down what you will say.
Communicate
Somebody advised me that the best ingredient for a healthy marriage is communication. Hence if you are planning to establish a family altar, start by telling your wife, and also informing the kids about the new family program. Tell them why as their parent you have decided to introduce this; that you care about their spiritual wellbeing and you believe it will help promote unity and godly love in the family.
Do it and maintain it
All the planning and preparation is vanity if in the end nothing is done. Call them when the time comes and lead them to the presence of the Redeemer. And guess what? It will not be perfect at all. From experience, I can inform you that family worship services have been the most challenging, yet the most helpful/humbling spiritual discipline of them all. Challenges range from crying kids, unconcentrating wife, outside noise, and other troubles that you find among humans. Yet in all this, Christ is glorified and your family will be edified if not saved from the very jaws of hell. Therefore, discipline yourself as a family leader and do it. Even more, maintain it. Set up a timely schedule (weekly or 2 weeks or even daily).
How do I do it?
The actual process of conducting a family worship is definitely not that complicated, as long you know the motive and the final result of it. Assuming you have already prayed, prepared and called everyone to the table; you can start by an opening prayer. For a start, you will have to do everything on your own such as the reading of Scripture, the teaching, and even the singing if you are not as bad at singing as I am (the idea is to set an example). Then as time goes by, bit by bit, others will learn to participate. Like I said, it’s not going to be all perfect, sometimes you might not be able to do everything that needs to be done. Just praying with them could also be enough.
Conclusion
It is better for my kids to reject my Bible efforts through their free will than for me to never attempt to do it, even though it might change their lives for the eternal good. If this article benefited you in any way, I suggest you pray about this and resolve that your family will not go to hell under your nose. As we teach them this beautiful Gospel, let us also not forget to set a practical example of that Gospel through the way we live. It begins with you, so help you God!
Sinothi Ncube
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