Defending The Beauty of Marriage

Often times when people discuss marriage – and I have been to those conversations – the highlight is always the sufferings and pains that it has brought to our brothers and sisters. Such talks have given everyone the impression that marriage is nothing but another form of a prison sentence. Because of such negative sentiments, we are seeing a new generation of young ones that no longer aspire to get into marriage. In fact, more and more people prefer to have short-term relationships than to “enslave” themselves to a lifetime commitment with someone. My question is: if being married is the worst mistake that one can make, why then is marriage still the most sort after (far above riches) thing on the earth’s surface? It’s because, no matter the bad publicity, we all know within ourselves that there are still great benefits of being a married somebody. This is what I wish to remind my readers today.  Mind you, we are taking this from a Christian perspective.

Companionship

Humans are the most social beings ever created. Therefore, there is nothing as satisfying as having someone of the opposite sex, ever besides; to love and be loved back; to share smiles, ideas, time, and even food. To have someone who will stick with you during both the good and bad seasons. Someone to live for; build a home and grow old – together! This, dear friends, is wonderful, something to be grateful for.

Trust

We live in a world that is so evil that you cannot trust anyone. Even those you have relied on for some time can surprise you, turn around and stab you on the back. Yet if I am to locate any place where mutual trust is still a living virtue, it would be nowhere else other than the marriage couch. Inside marriage, it’s easy to trust your partner with almost anything; from secrets that are too deep to be known, to something as precious as your own body. Tell me if that is not a good thing.

Love

“True love doesn’t exist anymore” is a popular trend these days. Well, from a world’s point of view, that is true, yet we who are believers know better than this clueless world. We know that our Lord Jesus is the perfect picture of how Christian marriage looks like. “Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself up for her” (Eph 5:25-27). In the same way, in a marriage where Christ is modeled, the husband loves her wife unconditionally, sacrificially and purposefully. That is the purest definition of true love. Who doesn’t dream to have such a thing?

Sex

I wanted to skip this because of reasons known only to myself. Yet, I must not. We are all aware that the world has corrupted and misused everything, no matter how beautiful it was, including something as sacred as sex. Still, it doesn’t change the fact that lovemaking is one of the greatest gifts given to us earthly creatures. Unlike the perversions of pornography, fornication and homosexuality, on the marriage bed, you don’t only get free intimate pleasure from your partner, but you also get the awesome privilege of joyfully giving the same. How about that?

Permanent

Putting aside the idea of divorce, marriage is a permanent thing – at least that is what it’s supposed to be. I don’t know about you, but I just don’t like the idea of changing my life now and then, be it a job, location, or in this case, a marriage partner. There is something peaceful about having something on a permanent basis. Imagine, for a lifetime, having someone who will be with you regardless of your weaknesses and troubles; one who is prepared to spend time with you from your youth life all the way to your last years on earth.  I have no words to describe the beauty of that.

Responsibility

One other reason why many young people don’t want to get into marriage is that they are so afraid of being responsible. They would rather be young until forever. They prefer the easy life of being under parental care till the Lord comes, than to grow into mature humans that are able to manage households; protect and provide for. Yet when you find yourself inside marriage, you will know that childhood is gone; it’s time to think, plan, hustle and even care not only about your interests but also the interests of your partner. That is good for your overall well-being.

Parenthood

Not only are we created in the image of our Maker, but we are also privileged enough to be able to produce offspring in our own likeness. It’s no secret that the best environment for the wellness and growth of a child is inside a healthy marriage, where both parents are present. Not only is it beneficial to children but to parents themselves. What else can give you a sense of life’s purpose than to join hands with your partner as you help each other to raise the next generation of world changers who will represent your name?

Conclusion

This writing is not intended to disregard the troubles that many of us face in marriages. Indeed marital challenges exist even to the best of couples. Regardless, I still argue that Christian marriage is the best thing that can happen to a living soul. Do not buy into the popular lie that married couples are miserable with each other all the time. This also must be an encouragement to them that are not married yet. Unless the Lord has called you to celibacy (lifetime singleness); use this time to prepare yourself for that future spouse, so that when he or she comes – at the right time – you will give yourself wholly to him/ her.  To the married I say, God has already given you that great blessing that money can’t buy. Be grateful for that and make the most of it, because “Marriage is honourable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge”- Hebrews 13:4.

(All thanks to my wife for her insights on this article)

Sinothi Ncube